Blood to Gold
by Elbereth in April
Summary: Harry Potter Crossover. Holly asks Artemis and Juliet to go undercover at Hogwarts to find someone who has been murdering fairies.
1. Default Chapter

Blood to Gold  
  
An Artemis Fowl--Harry Potter Crossover  
  
By Elbereth in April  
  
Copyright 2003  
  
Disclaimer: I own neither of these wonderful series or their characters.  
  
Time: Artemis Fowl, after Book 2  
  
Harry Potter, during Book 3  
  
Chapter 1  
  
"Let me see if I get this straight, sir," said Capt. Holly Short of the LEP. "You *want* to get in touch with Artemis Fowl?"  
  
Her Commander chomped away at his cigar, face red and scowling. "No, I don't *want* to. But I haven't got many other choices. The Council has voted, and I can't think of any better options. You know how many fairies have died already."  
  
Holly sobered. Yes, she did know.  
  
"So, go contact him."  
  
"You really think he'll help us?"  
  
"Tell him if he doesn't, we'll haunt him the rest of our lives."  
  
"And if he does?"  
  
Root sighed and rubbed his forehead. He didn't shout, which worried Holly a great deal. "Then we'll owe him one."  
  
________ _______  
  
Artemis Fowl sat, typing up an entry in his diary. "We just rescued my father a couple weeks ago. He's different now. He's spouting things like, 'Family is more important than money,' and 'The Fowls from now on will be going straight.' He's never believed anything like that before. Could it be the fairy magic? I don't understand. I don't know how I feel about it, either. Maybe by the time he fully recovers and leaves the hospital, he'll be back to normal."  
  
There was a knock on the door. He saved his entry, hid the file, and opened the door. "Ah, Butler. What is it?"  
  
"Miss Holly Short is at our front gate."  
  
Artemis raised his eyebrows. "Now that's interesting."  
  
The three of them plus Juliet, who wandered in uninvited, sat down in one of the studios. "Is this business or pleasure?" Artemis asked her, knowing the answer.  
  
"Business." She looked uncomfortable.  
  
"It's about the reports of deaths of elves and other fairies, yes?"  
  
Her eyes narrowed. "How did you know?--No, wait, I forgot who I was talking to."  
  
"I keep up on things," he said, with a glance at Butler, who smiled.  
  
"Well, we suspect who is behind them. Have you ever heard of Voldemort?"  
  
"It sounds familiar."  
  
"Twenty years ago, he came close to taking over the Magical community and killing all Muggles--that's humans without magic. He was only stopped by accident--or something. He tried to put a killing curse on an infant boy, and for some reason it rebounded back on him."  
  
"So he's dead."  
  
"Not exactly. His spirit is still around, and strong. He's trying to come back to life, and back to power. He was drinking unicorn blood. Now he's after fairies. When he kills a fairy, he gains some of its power. With every death, he gets stronger."  
  
Artemis looked at her closely. "That's bad, but why are you telling me? What can I do about it?"  
  
"We can't find Voldemort, but we know where one of his followers is. We want you to help us watch his disciple. Hopefully, he'll lead us to Voldemort."  
  
"Why do you need human help at all?"  
  
Holly fidgeted a bit. "I said we know where the follower is. But we're not entirely sure *who* he--or she--is. It would need a long-term stake-out. Above ground. In the middle of a large group of Mud People. We can't do that."  
  
Artemis almost smiled; the whole idea was absurd. "You want me to go undercover."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Look, I'd like to help, but my parents are watching now. I can't just disappear. I have to go back to boarding school."  
  
"Ah, but Artemis, he's *at* a boarding school. You'd just have to transfer."  
  
His eyebrows rose. "Is he now? The name?"  
  
"Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."  
  
He'd heard of it. He'd heard of a great many things most Muggles hadn't. "That's all well and good, but Hogwarts is invitation only, and I don't have magic."  
  
"Foaly has managed to work around that. You see, when students use magic, they always use a wand to focus their natural, inborn talent. But we can give you a wand that's already pre-loaded, so to speak, with magic from other, fairy sources. You can do a certain amount of spells per day, per charge."  
  
That sounded intriguing. That almost sounded--fun.  
  
"And I happen to have your invitation for enrollment right here." Holly pulled out a piece of parchment and handed it to him.  
  
"Artemis Fowl, Fowl Manor, Ireland," he read. "We are pleased to inform you have been accepted at Hogwarts. . .Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. . . Third year students will require. . ." He broke off. "They expect me to be a third year?"  
  
"Don't worry, I have a tutor all lined up for you. He's a gnome. He's my contact with Hogwarts. One of the professor's brothers. He'll teach all you need to know to be prepared. How to ride a broom, brew potions. . . you'll like it. And of course, you can get caught up on the reading in no time, with your intellect. . ." A coaxing smile.  
  
Artemis tapped his fingers on the parchment and thought.  
  
"We'll owe you," she said.  
  
He looked at her. "All right."  
  
"Only one thing. . . you won't be able to have Butler there."  
  
"I didn't expect it. He can't come to my other school, either."  
  
"Wait a minute," Butler protested. "He'll be in danger at that place!"  
  
"We'll be in close contact. Foaly has certain equipment to give him to report to us. I'll be ready and on call. You can stay at Hogsmeade, the closest town, if you want."  
  
"But. . ."  
  
"It'll be all right, Butler." Artemis sounded so confident, Butler almost felt reassured in spite of himself. Almost.  
  
"Absolutely not. If an unknown minion of an evil wizard is sleeping in the bed next to him. . ."  
  
"I'll go."  
  
Three heads swiveled to look at Juliet. "You?" Holly said.  
  
"I've almost completed my bodyguard training. I could protect him." Juliet looked extremely eager.  
  
"You didn't pass the final test!"  
  
"I'm ready despite that and you know it, big brother!"  
  
"Absolutely not!"  
  
"I'm eighteen. I can pass as a seventh year. If Foaly can make up another wand." She batted her eyelashes at Butler.  
  
"She makes sense," Holly said slowly. "It would surely make the search easier with two people there, as well."  
  
"Are transfers that common?"  
  
"No," Holly replied. "Maybe you could be cousins."  
  
"We don't look related," Juliet frowned.  
  
"She could be my step-sister," Artemis suggested. "Then you won't have the relocation of two households to explain."  
  
"Wait a minute!" Butler exclaimed again.  
  
They looked at him. He suddenly deflated. "Oh, all right." His brow remained creased with worry.  
  
Juliet leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "Trust me. OK?"  
  
Then he smiled at her. "OK, OK."  
  
"Oh, and Artemis. . ." Holly twisted a piece of her hair around and around her fingers. "Computersandthingswon'tworkthere, you'llbedoingwithoutmosttechnology."  
  
Artemis translated this. "No technology?" There was a heavy pause. "Not even cell phones?"  
  
"You can send owls. And talk to people through a fireplace. You write with quills. And use candlelight." Holly's smile was weaker now, she'd known this would be a sticking point.  
  
"Owls and fireplaces," Artemis repeated slowly.  
  
"You'll have a fairy communicator to reach Foaly and I, of course, and your wand will be pre-charged. We can give you a fairy. . . well, a palm-pilot, basically, for personal use, but you'll have to use it in private. Not for homework and stuff."  
  
"Do they even have indoor plumbing?"  
  
"That they have!" Holly smiled brightly, a false, pleading kind of brightness.  
  
"No Internet access."  
  
"You can owl Butler to do things for you."  
  
Artemis continued to stare at her.  
  
"You can study divination. And transfiguration," Holly blurted, despite the fact that she was appalled at some of the subjects Artemis would be learning. Even without inborn magic, Artemis would be able to figure out how to take what he learned with him and use it to add to the family fortune.  
  
"I'll do it," he said, a light in his eyes that worried Holly deeply.  
  
"We'll expect you to stay out of trouble. Both of you," with a glance at Juliet. "No illegal money-making schemes during the stake-out. Can you do that?"  
  
He sighed. "Yes."  
  
"We promise!" Juliet chirped, all enthusiasm and energy.  
  
Holly felt a moment of triumph before it was overshadowed by, What have I got myself into? "All right then."  
  
____________ ___________ 


	2. Chapter 2

Blood to Gold  
  
An Artemis Fowl--Harry Potter Crossover  
  
By Elbereth in April  
  
Copyright 2003  
  
Disclaimer: I own neither of these wonderful series or their characters.  
  
Time: Artemis Fowl, after Book 2  
  
Harry Potter, during Book 3  
  
Chapter 2  
  
Artemis, Juliet, and Butler had flown from Dublin to London, and were now making their way through a crowded train station, looking for Platform 9 and 3/4 to board the Hogwarts Express. The teens were pushing a trolley loaded up with two trunks, two broomsticks, and two owls in cages.  
  
Butler had secretly been pleased to watch Holly and the gnome, Faramir Flitwick, teach Artemis and his sister witchcraft. Artemis almost looked as though he were enjoying himself, and Holly was good for him; she wouldn't put up with any arrogance. But he was not happy that he would not be going with them to Hogwarts.  
  
"You will both be careful," Butler said again.  
  
"Of course. Juliet taught me how to punch somebody." Artemis's eyes were laughing. After Holly had hit him (twice), he'd decided it might be a good idea to learn some basic self-defense. "Of course, I'm still a thinker, not a fighter."  
  
But he looked healthier. He'd been outdoors more, more active. He wasn't quite so pale and frail as he used to be.  
  
They stopped in front of a stone pillar. "So," said Artemis. "I'm supposed to walk through it." He stared at it a moment. "I'm not sure about this."  
  
"It helps to just ignore any mental screaming and run for it," said a voice from behind them.  
  
They turned around. A girl with brown, slightly bushy hair stood there, smiling. Behind her a number of people stood in a clump, talking, arguing, and joking amongst themselves. They didn't to have noticed Artemis and his group yet. They had a couple trolleys piled with luggage, including owls, and they wore robes. He had apparently discovered fellow wizards.  
  
Artemis nodded at her. "Just run for it, eh?"  
  
She smiled. "That's right."  
  
"Mind over matter, Artemis!" Juliet put in cheerfully.  
  
"Are you a first year then? You look older."  
  
"We're transfers." Artemis indicated himself and Juliet. "From S`id--it's a little school in Ireland. I'm a third year."  
  
"Oh, me too! I'm in Gryffindor."  
  
"Oh, the four houses. I read about that in Hogwarts: A History."  
  
Her eyes glinted suddenly, as if she were quite pleased. "You've read it? All of it?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Do you know anyone here?"  
  
He shook his head.  
  
"Well, tag along with us then," she invited impulsively. "I'm Hermione Granger."  
  
Artemis was a bit disturbed by the vast wave of relief that swept over him. He hadn't realized how much he felt alone and out of his element. Juliet would be accompanying him, of course, but she really didn't count. "OK." He turned to Butler. "We'll be in touch."  
  
Butler put his hand on Artemis's shoulder. "Be careful. And," lowering his voice, "remember what Holly said. No funny schemes."  
  
Artemis half-smiled. "Butler. You wound me."  
  
Butler snorted. "Right. How could I ever accuse you of scheming?"  
  
A last look passed between them, then Artemis moved away and Juliet threw herself into Butler's arms. He used his quick reflexes to catch her.  
  
"Juliet. Think before you do things. Don't be too impulsive."  
  
"Right." She laughed, saluted, and turned to Hermione. "Lead on."  
  
Hermione led Juliet and Artemis over to the rest of her group, which seemed to be composed of mostly redheads and teenage boys.  
  
"This is Harry, and this is most of the Weasley Family," she laughed. "Percy, Ron, Ginny, Fred and George--twins, and of course, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley."  
  
There were nods and curious looks all around. Mrs. Weasley smiled in a motherly fashion. "Hello, dears. Go to Hogwarts, do you?"  
  
"We're starting there. I'm Artemis. Artemis Fowl."  
  
"I'm his step-sister, Juliet Butler."  
  
"They're transfer from Ireland," Holly volunteered. "Artemis is a third year, like us."  
  
"Well, let's not stand around here talking," said Mr. Weasley. "Let's go through. We'd better go in pairs; there are so many of us. Come on, Harry, we'll lead off." He and the brown-haired boy with glasses leaned against the pillar and disappeared through it. Artemis blinked. Well, that was easy enough. He felt he was becoming rather blasé about magic at this point in his life.  
  
The oldest boy and the redheaded girl took it a run then, followed by the twins. "Go on, Hermione, Artemis." Mrs. Weasley waved them forward.  
  
Artemis took ahold of his trolley and looked at the pillar with determination. "Ready?" Hermione asked. He nodded. She started forward at a jog. He narrowed his eyes, took a deep breath, and ran for it.  
  
Just as he was sure he would crash, the pillar morphed out and he was on an outside platform facing a large, red train that read "Hogwarts Express." So then. He'd made it. He adjusted his robe.  
  
"That wasn't so hard, was it?" Hermione asked, beside him.  
  
"No." He looked around. The rest of the redheads were already boarding the train. The brown-haired boy and the man were waiting for them. Behind them, Ron and Juliet popped into existence. The girl and the two boys huddled together as Juliet came to stand close by him. Then Mrs. Weasley appeared. That was everyone.  
  
Artemis watched everyone around them. These students looked just like the ones back at his old boarding school--normal teenagers, only with wands and strange animals. Most were wearing colors identifying them with one of the four houses.  
  
His new acquaintances were heading for the train. The grown-ups were waving goodbye. Artemis hurried to follow, Juliet behind him. They boarded.  
  
Once inside the aisle, Hermione turned to Artemis, Juliet, and Ginny apologetically. "Um, I'm sorry, Harry needs to talk to Ron and I in private."  
  
"They can come with me," said Ginny, glaring at the threesome, "since *some* people aren't very sociable."  
  
Artemis just waved it off. He and Juliet walked on with Ginny, in the wake of the twins, looking for a compartment with room for them.  
  
"Is there a lot of rivalry between houses?" Artemis asked the Weasley girl.  
  
"Oh yes. Well, mainly between Gryffindor and Slytherin. Mean, arrogant gits, the lot of them. The rest of the houses mainly just fight over Quidditch."  
  
It was a word Artemis was unfamiliar with, which galled him. "Quidditch?"  
  
She stopped and looked at him. "You don't know what Quidditch is?"  
  
Artemis looked annoyed. "No."  
  
"Oh, well, I'll let Fred and George explain it to you. They'd be more than happy to. Oh, hello, Neville." This to a boy who was moving awkwardly down the aisle, clutching a large toad.  
  
"Hi, Ginny! How was your summer?"  
  
"Fine, thanks. You?"  
  
"OK. I'm glad to be back. My grandmother was getting on my nerves."  
  
"This is Butler and Fowl."  
  
"Pleased to meet you." Neville offered his hand to Artemis.  
  
Artemis looked at it with disdain. Toad germs! "Are your hands slimy?"  
  
"What? Oh." Neville flushed and pulled back his hand.  
  
Ginny's eyes were wide. "Um. . ."  
  
"Your brothers went in there," Neville pointed, and moved on.  
  
Artemis ducked her stare and went in the compartment Neville had indicated, determined to learn about Quidditch.  
  
The only other occupants of the compartment were a girl and a boy who introduced themselves as Cedric Diggery and Cho Chang.  
  
"Chocolate frog?" the boy offered them.  
  
Ginny sat down, arranging her robes. "No, thanks."  
  
The twins took one immediately. Artemis took one and looked at it curiously. "It's not a real frog?"  
  
"He doesn't like frogs," Ginny tossed her hair. Artemis ignored her, not knowing what to do and hoping she'd get over it. He hadn't meant to insult that kid.  
  
"It's just magical chocolate. Try it."  
  
Juliet grinned and took one. "Thanks." She opened hers up. A frog made of chocolate hopped out. She grabbed it up as it tried to hop away.  
  
Artemis opened his, picked up the frog and examined it. The twins were eating theirs. He shrugged, and put his in his mouth. Yep, chocolate.  
  
Juliet appeared somewhat concerned as she looked up from her frog. "Don't you feel sort of. cruel? To eat something that seems so alive?"  
  
"Think of it as an animated Easter bunny," Artemis advised her.  
  
"Yeah. It's not really real," said Cedric.  
  
Juliet considered this, then ate the frog. "Tasty."  
  
"Where'd our fab Trio go?" asked a twin.  
  
"Off to be private." Ginny still looked a bit huffy.  
  
"Ah, yes. Private." The other twin waggled his eyebrows.  
  
Artemis looked his companions over. The redheads all seemed to be Gryffindors, according to their robes. "What are your houses?" he asked the other two.  
  
"Ravenclaw," said Cho.  
  
"Hufflepuff," Cedric said.  
  
"Will you be sorted with the first years?" a twin asked.  
  
"I suppose so." Artemis reflected on this a moment. Then, "Are you Fred or George?"  
  
Both boys spoke simultaneously. "Fred."  
  
Artemis leaned back and crossed his arms as the others laughed.  
  
Ginny relented, her good mood returning. "*That* one's Fred," she pointed, "and *that* one's George."  
  
Artemis determined right then to memorize them well enough to always be able to tell them apart. He didn't like being tricked.  
  
"All right then," he demanded after he had fixed them in his mind. "Someone tell me about Quidditch." He didn't like admitting he didn't know what everyone else seemed to. But how else would he learn? He couldn't be ignorant any longer.  
  
They all looked shocked. He hid a sigh.  
  
"Are your parents Muggles?" Cho asked, a question which also seemed to shock the others somewhat.  
  
"Yes," Juliet answered, raising her chin. "So what?"  
  
Cho looked embarrassed by the others' stares. "I'm just asking because it's a wizarding sport. Muggles aren't aware of it."  
  
"We all play," Fred indicated everyone there, "except Ginny."  
  
"We're Beaters." George nodded. "Chang's a Seeker. . ."  
  
Cedric interrupted, as Artemis and Juliet were just staring blankly. "There're seven players on each team. A Seeker, two Beaters, three Chasers, and a Keeper. Each house has a team. Also, there are international adult teams."  
  
The boys began eagerly explaining the game, interrupting each other, with the girls throwing in remarks occasionally. They went from the rules, to famous teams and players, different moves and fouls, fond game memories, until Artemis was sorry he'd asked. But he kept track of it all carefully. "Sounds like fun," Juliet commented with a smile.  
  
The conversation had finally turned to their summers and their plans for the school year when they sensed the train slowing. The others frowned. "We're not there yet, surely?"  
  
Then the lights went out. They froze, startled. "What's going on?" Cho whispered frantically, clutching onto Cedric's arm.  
  
"I don't know," he whispered back.  
  
"Artemis, don't move," Juliet commanded, sliding closer to him, in case she needed to defend him.  
  
"Lumos." The tip of George's wand lit up. They stared at each other in this dim light.  
  
Ginny was looking out the window. "There's shadows moving around out there. People. I think they're getting on the train."  
  
"This isn't normal, I take it," Artemis said.  
  
"No," Cedric and Ginny both replied.  
  
Artemis suddenly felt very cold. George's light went out as the door opened. Something stood in the doorway, cloaked, dark, faceless. His breath caught, then continued faster and shallower than normal. He felt bleakness settle into his bones, as he imagined everything that happened recently to be a dream; his father was still missing, and his mother was mad, and he was alone. . .  
  
Next to him, Juliet tried desperately to shake off her fear and do something. Anything. She couldn't move. But if that thing attacked Artemis, if it dared, she would stop it. She would. She swallowed hard.  
  
The thing seemed to search their compartment, then look directly at him for a long moment. He gripped the arms of his seat, afraid, anguished. . .  
  
Then it was gone, the door closing silently behind it. Another moment, and the train was moving again. The lights came back on.  
  
Ginny was crying. The twins, pale and unsettled themselves, nevertheless gathered around her to comfort her. Juliet was shaking with reaction. Cho buried her face against Cedric's shoulder. Cedric looked at Artemis.  
  
"What was it?" Artemis was disgusted to hear his voice crack.  
  
"A dementor. They're the prison guards of Azkaban. That was. . . that was. . . did you feel cold and. . . dead? As if you'd never been happy before and never would be again?"  
  
That was a good description, Artemis thought. He nodded, the barest of movements. "Why is it here?"  
  
"I have no idea. . ."  
  
____________ ___________  
  
The train stopped at last, and everyone scrambled to get out. The mood was much more somber than it had been. Artemis followed the others off the train.  
  
Outside, he looked around. There was a large deep lake, and beyond it, a tall, enormous castle dominated the skyline. A giant of a man lumbered by. "First years!" he called. "All first years, come with me!"  
  
A professor appeared before him. He was young, and rather shabbily dressed. "Are you Fowl and Butler?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"I'm Prof. Lupin. I'm new here, too." He gave a crooked smile. "We get to ride across with Hagrid and the first years in the boats. You need to be Sorted."  
  
"We'll see you later then," their companions said. "Good luck." Cedric clapped Artemis on the shoulder and Ginny gave Juliet a last smile.  
  
Nervousness stirred in Artemis's stomach but he ignored it.  
  
He got into a boat with Lupin, Juliet, and two anxious looking youngsters, both girls. As they floated towards the castle, Artemis pushed down his feelings of awe and wonder and asked Lupin, "Why are dementors here?"  
  
Lupin looked uncomfortable. "They're going to be guarding Hogwarts for awhile. Everyone's just nervous with--with Sirius Black having escaped and all."  
  
Interesting. An escaped prisoner, possibly at or near Hogwarts. Could this be Voldemort's accomplice?  
  
"An escaped prisoner?" Juliet exclaimed, making the first years jump. "Is he a madman? Is he armed and dangerous?"  
  
"He's very dangerous," Hagrid spoke up. He had a boat to himself, and was floating right next to them. "But he won't dare to be showin' himself around here, with Dumbledore watching, and now all these dementors lurkin' about. Nothing to trouble yourself about."  
  
"He'd better not come around here! I'd have to body-slam him!"  
  
"Body-slam?"  
  
"Headfirst into the mat!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Miss Butler, please! Sirius Black killed 13 people with one curse! If by some chance he did show up here, you wouldn't stand a chance!"  
  
Juliet sniffed. "If Mr. Black goes near Artemis, he will be one dead mad escapee. That's all I'm gonna say."  
  
____________ _________  
  
A/N: Next chapter: The Sorting, and Settling In, New Friends and Enemies. . . 


	3. 3

Blood to Gold  
  
An Artemis Fowl--Harry Potter Crossover  
  
By Elbereth in April  
  
____________ ___________  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Artemis and Juliet stood with a bunch of other newcomers at the front of the Great Hall, watching a hat sing. Artemis was fully aware of the absurdity of it.  
  
After only a short wait, Juliet's name was called. She bounced over to sit on the stool next to Prof. McGonagall. The professor put the hat on her head. "Gryffindor!" the hat proclaimed almost immediately.  
  
The Gryffindor table clapped as Juliet happily made her way over and sat down. She scooted a chair over and squeezed in between Fred and George.  
  
"Congratulations," Fred told her, shaking her hand.  
  
"Yeah," said George.  
  
"Thanks!" Juliet beamed. "This is fun! I like it here!"  
  
"I knew you were Gryffindor material," Ginny called over to her from a few places down. Juliet turned her grin on her. Ginny grinned back.  
  
"You're not a first year, surely?" asked the boy across from her.  
  
"No, I'm a transfer. I'm a seventh year, actually. I'm Juliet."  
  
"Oliver Wood."  
  
"Angelina Johnson," the girl next to him introduced herself. "It must be pretty weird to have to leave all your old friends and go to a new school for your last year."  
  
"Yeah. . . well. My mother re-married and then my step-father got a new job, and the next thing you know, here I am!" Juliet lied, thinking quickly.  
  
"At least you have your step-brother here with you. I mean, that's assuming you like him, of course." Fred scratched his head.  
  
"Of course I do! He's great!" Juliet looked back up to the front of the room where Artemis still awaited his turn.  
  
Meanwhile, Artemis was wondering if Juliet realized that they were very likely going to be sorted into different houses. Just at that moment, his name was called.  
  
One hard swallow, and he walked forward, deliberately projecting nonchalance. He looked at Prof. McGonagall, then sat down, facing the crowd. She reached up and put the hat on his head. He assumed his blankest expression.  
  
A voice spoke softly in his ear--a voice that apparently only he could hear. The hat. "So. . . interesting. A mind of astonishing intelligence. A distinct lack of conscience, but an underlying code of honor. And extreme loyalty and a great deal of courage."  
  
Artemis fought down a blush. "Yeah, well."  
  
"You seem to place a great value on money and power. And you have a definite lack of patience for fools. A great deal of ambition. You want to be great. Have people know your name."  
  
"Yes. And they will."  
  
"Despite a growing awareness of ethics and nobility, you maintain a basic core of ruthlessness."  
  
A half-smirk. "Well. . . yes."  
  
"And although you are proud of your genius and place a great premium on intellect, in the end I shall not place you in Ravenclaw. At heart I believe you're more suited for. . ." A pause. Then the hat proclaimed in a loud voice, "Slytherin!"  
  
The professor removed the hat and he stood. He took a quick glance to the Gryffindor table, where Juliet looked outraged, and his companions from the train looked quite shocked. Then he looked over to the Slytherin table. They were clapping his admittance to their house, but their faces were calculating and cold. He shrugged mentally and walked over to their table to join them.  
  
He simply chose the nearest open seat and sat down. His eyes met those of the boy across from him. Grey, like molten steel. He was pale, stark blonde, with an arrogant sneer. He dripped refinement in a way that screamed money and lineage. He regarded those around him with disdain. And he seemed familiar somehow.  
  
"A little old for a first year, aren't you?" the boy drawled. "What's the matter--did you fail a few times?"  
  
"I'm not first year. I'm third. I'm a transfer from Ireland," Artemis replied, completely calm. "And you are?"  
  
"Malfoy. Draco Malfoy."  
  
Artemis tilted his chin up. He'd heard of the Malfoys. He was right--Draco came from old name, big money. 'Hn. So do I.'  
  
"Fowl. Artemis Fowl the Second."  
  
Recognition of his own name flashed through Draco's eyes. Artemis smiled with an arrogance of his own. Egos clashed like two invisible force-fields, crackling along the edges almost visibly.  
  
And then Draco seemed to change his mind. His posture relaxed, the challenge dropped, and he smiled.  
  
"Well then, Artemis Fowl the Second. As a prominent figure in the wizarding world and the house of Slytherin, I had better take you under my wing. You need someone to guide you through life at Hogwarts. I can help you with that."  
  
He did want inside information. This would be a start. "Sounds good," said Artemis Fowl.  
  
_________ __________  
  
"See that boy coming in the door late? With the ugly Mudblood girl?" Draco whispered to Artemis a little later.  
  
Artemis looked. It was Harry and Hermione, from the train station. "Yeah. I see them."  
  
"That's Harry Potter and one of his cronies, Granger. They're despicable. I hate them. And their other stupid sidekick, Weasel boy."  
  
Draco's voice conveyed real loathing. Then it clicked to Artemis who Harry Potter was. The baby who vanquished Voldemort, Holly had told him. The Boy Who Lived.  
  
Interesting.  
  
"Why do you hate him?"  
  
Draco blinked a moment. "He's always posturing. Just interested in his fame. And what's he done, really? He managed to not die once, that's all. It's not like he has any real talents. He could have done something, been something. But he's wasting himself on Muggle-lovers and Mudbloods. Fighting against *real* wizards. He's a prat."  
  
Artemis wasn't sure what a Mudblood was, but he could tell a killing insult when he heard one. But then Malfoy stopped speaking, and his eyes narrowed as he stared at Artemis.  
  
"I've heard of the Fowls," he said. "There have been wizards in the line before. But not all of them. You're not pureblood, either, are you? But the hat sorted you into Slytherin." He was talking low enough that no one else could hear, although the others at the table were watching, curious about this new boy, wondering how he rated actually being befriended by a Malfoy. Very few people could say that.  
  
Artemis stared back at Draco, assessing him. He had expected the other boy to insult him as well, but Draco seemed to be more puzzled and considering than anything. He answered equally quietly. "I'm not entirely pureblooded, no. My mother is a witch," he lied, counting it best not to be pure Muggle. "But my dad is not a wizard. Our line has mixed. But we're quite powerful, for all that. And as you know, quite rich, and our name is well known and respected."  
  
Draco appeared to give this serious thought. "My father says only purebloods are worthy, but you're Slytherin. . . so there must be something more about you, yes? Something unique to counterbalance the taint."  
  
Artemis raised his eyebrows. "Indeed."  
  
"So what's unique about you? Do you think?"  
  
Artemis shrugged. "For one thing, I'm a genius."  
  
"Are you?" That could come in handy for scheming against other houses. Not to mention it would be a pleasant change from Crabbe and Goyle. "OK. I'm not going to worry about it then. You're Slytherin, that's enough."  
  
"Lucky me," Artemis said dryly.  
  
"I wouldn't mention it to the rest of the house, though," Draco told him in an even softer voice. Artemis acknowledged this.  
  
A girl leaned so close to Draco her lips almost touched his cheek. "What are you two whispering about?" she demanded.  
  
"You, of course, Pansy," he replied absently.  
  
"No, what are you *really* talking about?" another girl asked.  
  
"Purebloods," Draco said. "Fowl, this is Bulstrode and Parkinson, that's Crabbe and Goyle, Zabini, and Crow."  
  
Zabini had spiky dark brown hair and striking pale blue eyes. "Charmed." He waved a hand lazily.  
  
Crow wore his hair in a long black braid and had deep brown eyes. He was gorgeous, and he smiled a lot, for a Slytherin. It was hard not to like him.  
  
The girl on the other side of Crow, across from Crabbe, leaned forward and cleared her throat. "Oh, and that's Zaneta Flint." Draco smirked. "She's got a thing for Snape."  
  
"Malfoy!" the girl protested.  
  
"Well, you do," Zabini agreed, propping his chin on his fist.  
  
"Which one's Snape?"  
  
"*Professor* Severus Snape," Crow grinned, tossing his braid over his shoulder. "That one, at the head table." He pointed.  
  
Artemis looked at Snape, then back at Zaneta. "Really."  
  
"He's Head of Slytherin, and he teaches Potions, so you'll get to know him for yourself," said Bulstrode.  
  
Crabbe and Goyle, who were fighting over the last piece of cake, laughed. "He likes us," Goyle volunteered.  
  
"But he doesn't like Gryffindors!" Crabbe finished.  
  
"Hello, Baron," Zabini called, waving at someone. Artemis turned to see. It was a ghost--a skinny, aristocratic looking male, covered in silvery blood.  
  
The ghost nodded regally. He appeared to inspect the newcomers to the Slytherin ranks. Then he turned to their Prefects. "Any high hopes for this lot?"  
  
"It's a bit soon to say, but I don't expect any great disappointments, at any rate," a sixth-year girl answered.  
  
"This one seems rather promising," Bulstrode remarked, pointing. "Even Malfoy seems to like him."  
  
The ghost floated over and peered at Artemis. "Your name?"  
  
"Artemis Fowl." They studied each other.  
  
"This is the Bloody Baron," Zabini told him.  
  
"I went to school with a Fowl," the Baron mused. "Wealthy Irish lass. Only non-Slytherin I ever managed to tolerate. Ravenclaw, she was. Ah! If times had been different. . . I wouldn't have minded marrying her."  
  
All the students gaped at him. The Baron never talked much, and no one had ever heard so much about his past before.  
  
"What was her first name?"  
  
"Sophia." He sighed, eyes taking on a dreamy, far away look.  
  
"Well," Artemis said after the ghost was silent for a few minutes, "it was an honor to meet you."  
  
The Baron's gaze returned to him. "And you. I'm sure you'll do Slytherin proud. I shall warn Peeves the poltergeist not to bother you. Good day." And he floated to the other end of the hall.  
  
"Full of surprises, aren't you?" Pansy looked at Artemis as if unhappy by all the attention he was receiving.  
  
"Hmm. So is Hogwarts. My life is clearly going to be fascinating from now on." He ignored the stares of the rest of the table.  
  
"Hn." Pansy stuck her nose in the air and turned her head away.  
  
Draco laughed.  
  
___________ ____________  
  
Artemis found his things waiting for him in the third year boys' bedchamber. He looked around at the four-poster beds. Crabbe and Goyle had gone to sleep, pulling their curtains. Zabini was sitting next to Crow on his bed, examining the Sneakoscope Crow had brought from home. Draco was carefully hanging up his robes.  
  
"So, Ireland," Crow began suddenly as Artemis was sorting through his trunk. "I've been there. What part are you from?"  
  
"Near Dublin."  
  
"Do you like Quidditch?" Draco interrupted. "I'm House Seeker."  
  
'I might if I'd ever seen it,' Artemis thought. "I do. I'm happy for you."  
  
"Did you bring any candy from home?" Crow demanded. "Any of you?"  
  
They all shook their heads except for Draco. "Pansy gave me some. I don't want to eat anything of hers, though. Here." He took a bag and threw it on his bed. "Divvy up."  
  
Zabini snatched the bag and started sorting though the contents. "Homemade fudge! Yes!"  
  
"Hey!" Crow made a grab for the bag, but Blaise pulled back.  
  
"Share," Artemis commanded, holding out his hand.  
  
Zabini gave a fake pout, then relented and gave them both a piece. "Arithmancy first thing tomorrow," he spoke around his mouthful of chocolate. "Then Potions."  
  
"Fun. Get off my bed now. I want to sleep." Crow pushed at Zabini's shoulder.  
  
"Fine, I'm going."  
  
"It's too early for bed. How about Exploding Snap?" Draco suggested.  
  
"OK," Blaise agreed.  
  
"Fowl?"  
  
"I've never played it." Artemis shifted, uncomfortable already with all the things he'd never done or heard of.  
  
Zabini and Malfoy looked at each other. "No problem. We'll teach you. We play for money, by the way."  
  
Artemis laughed. It was nice in a way, to be surrounded by so many people as crooked as he was. "I'm up for it."  
  
Two hours later, Artemis was ahead by 125 Galleons, and the other two boys disgustedly decided to go to bed.  
  
_________ ___________  
  
A/N: Thanks everybody, for reviewing! My other crossover, for those interested, is called "The Family Name." 


	4. 4

Blood to Gold  
  
By Elbereth in April  
  
Chapter 4  
  
Artemis's first class was History of Magic with the Ravenclaws. He walked there with the other third year boys. Draco was sharing information about various people they passed, mainly in the form of nasty insults.  
  
"About Crabbe and Goyle." Artemis cast a sideways glance back at them, walking just behind.  
  
Draco raised his eyebrows. "Yeah?"  
  
"They seem to serve as sort of--unofficial bodyguards."  
  
"Yeah. They work pretty well. . . not too bright, though."  
  
As they were about to enter the door of their classroom, another group of students tried to enter at the same time, cutting them off.  
  
"Hey!" Draco yelled angrily. "We were here first! Quit blocking the doorway!"  
  
The group turned--three girls and one boy, dressed in Ravenclaw colors. One was Cho Chang.  
  
"You don't *own* this school, Malfoy," the girl next to her snapped.  
  
Artemis nodded to Cho. "Hello, Chang. Who's your friend?"  
  
Cho blushed. "Oh, um, Artemis. This is Marietta Edgecombe. And that's Leonard Bevly and that's Daedelus Mayes."  
  
Artemis's eyes widened a fraction as his stomach flipped. He had no particular burning interest in girls yet, but it occurred to him that Daedelus was a very pretty girl. She had light brown hair that framed her heart-shaped face in long, spiral curls, and eyes of the deepest blue.  
  
"Chivalry dictates that you let the girls go first, Malfoy," she said calmly.  
  
"Chivalry is dead," Draco responded flatly.  
  
"Oh, let them go, Malfoy," Artemis sighed.  
  
"You don't seem to understand Slytherin principal." Draco turned his cold grey eyes on Artemis. The girls snuck the opportunity to sneak on through the door.  
  
Artemis smirked at Draco and clamped his hand around the Ravenclaw boy's arm as he moved to follow the girls. "I would never leave you hanging with no one to torment. I said the girls could go, for chivalry's sake. I said nothing about him." He pushed Bevly forward in front of Draco.  
  
Draco gave a sudden answering smirk. "That's more like it. I'd hate to think the Sorting Hat made a mistake." He focused on the rapidly paling boy standing in front of him.  
  
"You don't scare me," Leonard lied, eyes darting around the hallway in search of help. None appeared to be forthcoming.  
  
Inwardly, Artemis sighed. This whole show was pointless, but he'd seen the way Draco was looking at him, as if Artemis was trying to undermine his authority. As new as he was, he couldn't afford to do that. So he waited patiently while Draco taunted Leonard, and Crabbe and Goyle laughed, and Draco turned his bookbag into a rat. While Leonard chased it, trying to change it back, the Slytherins entered the classroom.  
  
Daedelus looked up as Artemis passed by, and gave him a cool half-smile, as if she held all the secrets to the universe, and if he was good enough, she might be willing to share.  
  
But Artemis was already sure of his answers, and gave her the same smile right back.  
  
_________ ____________  
  
Potions with Snape was interesting. It was very precise, a true science. He sat down in between Malfoy and Crow. He noted the way the Slytherins and the Gryffindors glared at each other. There was that kid with the toad, who seemed scared to death of Snape. And there was Zaneta Flint, who, he was amused to see, was gazing at the professor with adoring eyes. Draco tensed up beside him when Potter, Weasley, and Granger walked in. They glanced over, feeling Draco's hatred, and apparently returning it. Hermione met his eyes once in a confused way, as if still unable to believe that someone polite and normal-seeming had wound up in Slytherin. He raised an eyebrow at her.  
  
After class, he found Juliet waiting for him. "Artemis, how are you doing? Is there anybody I need to put out of action yet?"  
  
"Um, no, thanks for asking. Everything's fine. You?"  
  
"I'm having fun! This place is great!"  
  
"Glad you think so." His lips quirked.  
  
"Fowl, why are you talking to a Gryffindor?" Draco demanded, coming up, trailing Slytherins.  
  
"Malfoy, meet my stepsister, Miss Juliet Butler."  
  
They eyed each other. Juliet's eyes began to narrow. "Want me to take him?" she whispered to Artemis.  
  
He pictured the commotion that would cause. His lips twitched again, but he answered, "No, not this time anyway."  
  
Juliet's eyes slid over to Crabbe and Goyle, flanking Draco on his left and right. "Say," she said, cheerful again, "they remind of the Pincer and the Falcon!"  
  
Draco and Artemis stared at her blankly, but Crabbe spoke up. "From World Wide Wrestling?"  
  
"Of course! You know, I named my owl Avenging Angel, after the greatest female wrestler of all time!"  
  
"You think the Avenging Angel is better than Amazon Woman?" Goyle asked.  
  
"Most definitely! Admittedly, Amazon Woman knows how to show off in tights. . ." this with her hands on her hips and a toss of her head, "but the Angel is far more talented!"  
  
Draco, Artemis, Blaise, and Laine looked at each other. "Shall we move along, Malfoy?" Artemis suggested hopefully.  
  
"Let's," was the firm reply. Juliet, Crabbe, and Goyle didn't appear to notice as they continued to talk wrestling in loud, excited voices.  
  
"You have a weird stepsister, Fowl," Zabini said.  
  
"I know."  
  
__________ ____________  
  
Divination was a great disappointment. In Artemis's opinion, the professor was a showy, fraudulent wacko. But the books gave him greater hope. Maybe he could learn on his own. Foreseeing the future would come in extremely handy in any number of circumstances.  
  
For that first lesson, Crow and Artemis were paired up to read each other's tea leaves. "All you need is a good imagination, really," Crow remarked. "This gunky stuff here in the bottom of the cup. Could be anything. But what do you *want* it to mean? Then you just squint hard enough, until that's what you see."  
  
"That's a good plan. But we don't know what stands for what yet. So I'll guess. This soggy mass here could be a--a tree. What does that indicate?"  
  
"Rootedness and strength, I think. Wait." Crow turned pages in his book. "Is it oak-looking or pine-looking?"  
  
"Bare-branched, I'd say."  
  
Crow glanced over."That doesn't look anything like a tree to me."  
  
Artemis grinned. "Here comes Trelawny. Shall we ask her?"  
  
"No!" Apparently, he shared the same low opinion of her.  
  
"Crow, Thaddeus Laine, and Fowl, Artemis the Second." Trelawny stopped in front of them. "How are you progressing?"  
  
"Um. . ." Crow and Artemis looked at each other. The professor reached out and took Artemis's cup. She peered into it.  
  
"Ah," she intoned, "you are seeking. You will uncover many mysteries. Much will befall you. I sense trials ahead."  
  
Artemis frowned. Crow rolled his eyes.  
  
Then Trelawny let out a piercing shriek and dropped the cup. "Death!" She put one hand over her heart. "I have seen your death! Oh, poor boy!"  
  
Artemis raised an eyebrow. "Highly unlikely."  
  
"I'm afraid there is no changing the stars!"  
  
"Those weren't stars, they were tea leaves."  
  
"But. . ."  
  
Artemis looked her in the eye. "I can outwit death anytime."  
  
She blinked. An odd expression crossed her face. "I believe class-time is over," she said.  
  
The students shuffled around, gathering up their books, looking at Artemis out of the corner of their eyes. He sighed and ignored them all. He brushed past Trelawney and left the room.  
  
"You told her," Crow smirked approvingly as they headed down the stairs. "I don't believe in any of that mystic mumbo-jumbo crap."  
  
"Not in her version of it, anyway," Artemis replied.  
  
____________ ____________  
  
At lunch, Artemis sat in between Draco and Zabini, and across from Zaneta Flint. "Why Snape?" he asked her. She just stuck her tongue out at him.  
  
"I hear your death has been predicted for next Wednesday." Draco looked at Artemis with amusement. "Serves you right for taking Divination."  
  
"Actually no date was given. . . How did you hear?"  
  
"Pansy told me."  
  
"You don't believe in divination then?"  
  
"A man makes his own destiny."  
  
"Yes. . . but it would be nice to get a few hints of the future. You could know where to invest your money, for example."  
  
Draco smirked. "You want to cheat at placing bets, that sort of thing?"  
  
"I do," Crow replied.  
  
"Boys," complained Pansy, who was sitting on the other side of Draco. "Divination is about secrets of the universe, not sidebets at Quidditch."  
  
"Secrets of the universe?" Zabini scoffed.  
  
"Yes! Like. . ." she lowered her voice. ". . . will You-Know-Who return soon?"  
  
There was instant quiet among their group at the table. Then, "Could you really tell that?" Bulstrode asked in a hushed tone.  
  
"Well, I couldn't, not yet, but a good, experienced Seer could."  
  
"Someone other than Trelawney, you mean," Crow snorted.  
  
"Obviously. Someone like. . . Draco's mother."  
  
Draco tensed. "Who's been spreading rumors about my mum? She's not a Seer!"  
  
"Well, *my* mum said. . ."  
  
"Your mum is a brainless social-climber, Pansy! Just like you! And neither of you know what you're talking about." Draco sounded truly furious.  
  
The others stared at him, calculating looks back on their faces.  
  
"What do you think will happen when. . . You-Know-Who is back?" Artemis asked slowly.  
  
"He'll put all the purebloods back in charge, where we should be," Bulstrode stated confidently.  
  
"And kill the rest," Crabbe added.  
  
There were murmurs of assent. Only Crow seemed a bit put off by this. The Slytherin camp was apparently firmly rooting for Voldemort. And maybe doing more than just cheering to help him along.  
  
After lunch, Artemis followed Pansy, Bulstrode, and Flint to Transfiguration, eavesdropping shamelessly.  
  
"I thought you did quite well in Divination today," Zaneta, who had been Pansy's partner, told her.  
  
Pansy tossed her head back. "I do seem to have a natural talent."  
  
"What was Malfoy's problem?"  
  
"Oh, who knows? The insulting, arrogant git. He thinks his family is so much better than everyone else's. He knows perfectly well his father will probably end up matching him off with me some day, so he can just get over it."  
  
"Married to Malfoy? I feel for you," Bulstrode smirked.  
  
"Well. . . he is dreamy, though, isn't he?" Pansy giggled. The other girls giggled, too.  
  
In Transfiguration, he almost ended up sitting at a desk with Goyle, which he was sure would have lowered his IQ considerably, given enough time. He faked stopping to tie his shoe, until Millicent was forced to sit there instead. He was going to end up sharing with a Slytherin with a sour, constipated expression who he hadn't spoken to yet, but one who knew the others considered to be a prat. . . or a Ravenclaw.  
  
His eyes searched for the pretty girl he remembered from earlier, Daedelus. He found her already seated, alone. He had scant seconds to beat Cho Chang out from sitting next to her. He swerved around, cut her off, and stole the chair. "Mayes. How are you?"  
  
She smiled at him as Cho huffed indignantly and moved away. "Fine, and you?"  
  
"Quite well, thanks."  
  
"I've always liked Transfiguration. It opens a world of possibilities. Don't you think?"  
  
He certainly did. He nodded. She decided she rather liked his knowing expression. "Knowledge is power," she added. "That's why I like learning."  
  
Artemis shrugged. "Gold is power. Aurum est potestas."  
  
"Therefore," said Daedelus, "knowledge is gold."  
  
Artemis raised the glass they were to transform. "Here's to higher education."  
  
_________ _________  
  
After class, his last for the day until Astronomy that evening, Draco told him, "I have my first Quidditch practice now. Crabbe and Goyle are going to hang out and watch awhile. You can, too, or I think Zabini is going to the library to study until supper."  
  
"I'm going to go to the Common Room and stare at the fire until I get a headache," Crow volunteered. "Parkinson and Bulstrode are going to hide in a corner and gossip, and Zaneta is going to go discuss her Potions assignment with Snape. Take your pick."  
  
"I think I'll come watch practice for a few minutes. Then I want to go to the Owlery and check on my owl. And maybe explore the castle a bit."  
  
"Suit yourself," Draco replied.  
  
Shortly thereafter, Artemis was sitting in the third row of the Slytherin stands, with Crabbe and Goyle on either side. He thought they were used to having someone in the middle and were now only comfortable as bookends.  
  
The team came out of the changing room onto the field, broomsticks in hand. Crabbe pointed each one out. "That's Warrington and Montague, they're Chasers. Marcus Flint, Zaneta's older brother, Captain and Chaser. Those are the Beaters, Derrick and Bole. Our Seeker, you know, obviously. And the Keeper, Reed."  
  
"They all older than us?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Two girls came toward them, up the stairs to their row, and sat a few feet away on their bench. "Boys," the first girl said in a husky, tantalizing sort of voice.  
  
"Hi," Crabbe and Goyle answered a bit breathlessly.  
  
"I'm Catalina Ellyworthies," the second girl introduced herself. Artemis recognized her as the Prefect from last night's talk with the Bloody Baron.  
  
"I'm Havanna Scarlett." The first girl held out her hand for Artemis to shake. He did so, smirking inwardly. She obviously thought any man she met would fall at her feet, and while Artemis figured most probably did, he was too smart to fall to that.  
  
Scarlett was indeed a beauty, though, with hair so black it was almost blue, large sea-green eyes, and full lips, high cheekbones and perfect figure. She wore expensive looking robes. Her fingernails were long and painted Slytherin green; tiny, enchanted, silver snakes coiled and hissed on each nail.  
  
Catalina was small and slender with hair the shade of old oak. She had a dainty little face with a pointed chin, and almond colored eyes.  
  
"Ellyworthies and Warrington are dating," Goyle informed Artemis. "This week, anyway."  
  
Artemis raised his eyebrows. Catalina blushed.  
  
"It's an on and off sort of relationship," Havanna explained dryly. "They fight and break up, kiss and make up, over and over. Since, like second year. Sad, really."  
  
"Oh, be quiet, Scarlett!" Catalina scowled.  
  
Havanna just smiled lazily.  
  
"There they go." Crabbe pointed to the field. The balls had just been released and the players mounted their brooms and took to the air.  
  
They watched in silence for awhile, Artemis frankly fascinated by this strange, complex game. He could see the strategy in it. His eyes narrowed as he took it all in and planned ahead, like chess moves, and they were the pieces. . .  
  
"Hey, Artemis," Goyle said suddenly in a low voice. "That sister of yours. . . how old is she?"  
  
"18. Why?" he answered absently.  
  
Goyle exchanged a look with Crabbe. "Just curious. She Irish, too? She doesn't quite look it."  
  
"She has a very mixed ethnic background and has lived in a number of different countries but spent most of her life in Ireland."  
  
"She's very knowledgeable about wrestling."  
  
"She could clothesline you, mate," Artemis said, and grinned.  
  
Artemis ended up staying and watching the practice for a good 40 minutes; then he left, headed for the Owlery. Catalina came along with him, saying Warrington was unlikely to notice her absence.  
  
"What's your owl's name?" she asked.  
  
"Sprite." Artemis shrugged.  
  
"Mine's Nimue." She laughed. "I like to go check on her, but I always feel stupid going alone. It seems silly to talk to a bird, and sometimes the others laugh at me for doting on a pet."  
  
"Well, you'll get no ridicule from me."  
  
Catalina gave him a long look. "I believe you. I like you, Artemis. You seem hard enough, but there's something very. . . noble about you, at the same time. And I don't mean that as an insult, in this case."  
  
Artemis barely prevented a blush. "Um, thanks."  
  
"How did your school work back in Ireland? Did it have houses?"  
  
"No, it was too small."  
  
"I heard you won over 100 Galleons off Malfoy and Zabini last night. Had you really never played Exploding Snap before?"  
  
"No, never."  
  
"Beginner's luck?"  
  
"Simple strategy." Artemis spoke carelessly, as if life was easily met and won. "All games can be broken into strategy at their heart. Once you see the line, you have it. I can win at most any game, unless they're strictly luck and chance. Even then, there are usually odds."  
  
A predatory smile crossed Catalina's face. "Really?"  
  
He nodded.  
  
"Fowl, I want to be your manager. That is a very useful talent to have. I could help you fully exploit it."  
  
Artemis laughed. "And here I thought you were a 'nice' Slytherin."  
  
"I am. But winning is winning."  
  
They had reached the entrance to the Owlery. 'She seems like a very useful inside source,' Artemis thought. 'I bet I could learn a lot from her.' So he nodded. "You're on." ____________ _____________  
  
A/N: I love my reviews! I love my reviewers! 


	5. 5

Blood to Gold  
  
An Artemis Fowl--Harry Potter Crossover  
  
By Elbereth in April  
  
Chapter 5  
  
They were walking back to the dungeons when they passed a Slytherin boy Artemis had seen in classes that day and marked out as being particularly malicious and cruel. He was standing in the hall and shaking down some first years for any valuables in their possession.  
  
"Who is that?" he hissed at Catalina.  
  
"Morag MacDougal," she answered, an expression of distaste on her face. "Can't stand him. He comes from a line of Scots lairds, but he's no blueblood. He's a low-class butcher."  
  
"Butcher?"  
  
"He likes to kill and dissect small animals. He turns them into ingredients for Snape for potions, so he's allowed. But he just does it cause he likes to torture things." She snuck a glance back at him and shuddered. "Try not to let him catch you alone; he's a lot bigger than you."  
  
"I noticed. He's Crabbe and Goyle sized."  
  
She smiled. "I think they have a crush on your sister. I was listening to your conversation earlier."  
  
He stared at her blankly. "On Juliet?"  
  
"Mm hm." Her eyes danced.  
  
"Juliet and Crabbe or Goyle?"  
  
She giggled at his reaction and nodded.  
  
Abruptly he smirked. "I want to be there when she finds out."  
  
"What would she do?"  
  
"If I'm there to restrain her, probably only break their legs."  
  
"What kind of hex would do that?"  
  
"Oh, she wouldn't use her wand. She tends to react more physically to news like that." He smirked some more.  
  
She shook her head. "Not me. I'm a wand kind of girl. What about you?"  
  
"Am I a wand kind of girl?"  
  
"You know what I mean!"  
  
"I prefer to use my head. I work the situation to my advantage so I don't have to use either. I like to get things to play my way."  
  
"Oh, Fowl, I am definitely going to start managing you right away."  
  
"You do that. I don't think I'm going back to the dungeons now, though. I want to explore the castle."  
  
They stopped in the corridor just one turn away from the dungeon steps. "Alone? You don't know how lost you can get here."  
  
He shrugged. "I'm used to being a loner." This wasn't strictly true. He was used to being shadowed by Butler. But at his old school, he was used to being alone.  
  
A person rounded the corner as they spoke, and paused at seeing them. "Hey Fowl, Ellyworthies. What are you up to?"  
  
"Hey, Crow. I'm going to my room. Fowl's going wandering Hogwarts to see what he can see. You?"  
  
"The bored prowling thing. I've stared at the fire as long as I can." Crow pushed a strand of hair out of his face, hesitating. Then, "Want to wander together?"  
  
"Um, sure. Why not?" Leave no source unturned.  
  
"Good!" Catalina clapped her hands. "I'm off then. Fowl, I'll see you later!" She waved and departed.  
  
"Warrington will be jealous," Crow said when she was gone.  
  
"Of a guy three years younger than her?"  
  
"Probably."  
  
Artemis shrugged. "He'll have to deal with it. We're business partners."  
  
"Hmm," was all Crow said.  
  
They headed off away from the dungeons. "Well, what is there to see in one huge, old castle with moving pictures, shifting staircases, doors that lead nowhere, secret passages, all in the light of nothing but flickering candles?"  
  
"Huh. It does sound like an adventure, when you put it that way." Crow perked up, looking a good deal more cheerful. "Right then. Secret passages, unused rooms. Strange statutes, suits of armor. Let's go this way. I'll show you."  
  
They turned left down a slightly dustier, less-used passage.  
  
"Why have you spent the last hour staring at the fire?" Artemis asked curiously.  
  
"To empty my head," Crow replied. "I have a photographic memory, and I like to clear my head after the first day of classes. First day back's always the most intense. Then I settle back down into it."  
  
"Hmm. I like my head full. . . get good grade's then, do you?"  
  
"Well. . . on all the book parts. I don't do so well in practical magic. Especially charms." He made a face. "Flitwick's washed his hands of me."  
  
"Go with your strong points, I always say."  
  
"I get top marks in History of Magic. But that's boring."  
  
Artemis looked around as they walked. All the walls in Hogwarts seemed to be covered in portraits. And the people in them moved and talked, and left one frame for another. "I wonder," he said slowly, "how much the pictures see."  
  
He had spoken very quietly. "What?" Crow frowned.  
  
"Where does this hall go?" Artemis asked instead of repeating his previous words.  
  
"Past Lupin's office and the DADA classroom, up to the wall, past the greenhouses, down to an unused music room, to a dead-end, where there's a secret passage to the Great Hall."  
  
"DADA?"  
  
"Defense Against the Dark Arts. I wonder how Lupin will do. We've had a different professor every year."  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Yeah. First year was Quirrell--weird guy, by the book sort. Learned some interesting theory but never got a chance to try any of it out. Second year was Lockheart--that guy was an overly dressed prat. Waste of time and space. Now Lupin. An unknown. And definitely not over-dressed!" He snorted. "It's funny. And everybody knows Snape's wanted the job for years and he never gets it."  
  
"Does he run them off?"  
  
"No. . . now that you mention it, though, they've all come to strange ends. Quirrell had some sort of nasty magical accident that killed him. And Lockhart had a memory charm backfire and went crazy. But none of it was Snape's fault. He's an all right guy."  
  
"Then why doesn't he ever get the job?"  
  
"I don't know. Maybe there's nobody better for Potions? He's really good."  
  
Well, well. Artemis added Snape and Lupin to his list of people to watch.  
  
They made their way down the hall, to a little door that led out to a curtain wall. They walked along the top. They could look down and see the greenhouses, as Crow had said, and past that a small hut, with smoke coming from the chimney, and past that, the dark Forbidden Forest.  
  
"Who lives in that hut?"  
  
"Hagrid, the gamekeeper. Guess we'll have Care of Magical Creatures there now. That'll be a route, too. He's no teacher. He's a moron."  
  
"He's big."  
  
"We think he's part giant."  
  
"We?"  
  
"You know. Our crowd. Malfoy and his two goons and Zabini. And the girls."  
  
"Ah." *Our* crowd. So, he was included. "Why is the forest forbidden?"  
  
"There're some really nasty things in there! Things that'll eat you. Seriously. Also, centaurs, and unicorns."  
  
"Centaurs?"  
  
"Uh huh. They don't like humans. Oh, and I heard there's spiders as big as those Muggle vehicles--cars. And willow-the-wisps. And worse."  
  
"I see. I'll make it a point to stay out of the forest, then."  
  
"Yeah. Oh, and there's a giant squid in the lake, so don't go swimming. What else should you know about?" They reached the end of the wall and went through another door and down a spiral stone staircase. "Oh, remind me to point out the Whomping Willow."  
  
'It's a good thing Butler isn't aware of all these dangers, or he'd come drag me home,' Artemis thought. And Artemis wasn't ready to go home. He hadn't solved the mystery yet. Or found the other person he was looking for- -the secret reason he'd agreed to come to Hogwarts.  
  
"This is the old music room." They walked in. It did look like a music room, with steps going down to the center, and an old, abandoned piano. They walked through and out a door on the other side.  
  
They came to a long passage lined with sconces every few feet. The walls on both sides were covered with enormous portraits, at various heights. Arrow slits were set high up in the top of the walls. "Just a little farther," Crow commented.  
  
A ghost floated out of an empty classroom and regarded them. He wore friar's robes on his chubby, pale frame. "Hello, Friar," Crow nodded. "He's the Hufflepuff ghost," he told Artemis.  
  
"Hello, boys," the friar returned cheerfully. "Fine day."  
  
They kept walking to the end of the hall, where a large tapestry hung. Crow pushed it aside and tapped twice on a certain stone in the wall. A door- sized section shifted aside with a groan. "Ta dah," Crow trilled, waving at it with a flourish.  
  
"Cool," Artemis admitted.  
  
"Follow me." Crow stepped through, Artemis just behind. He caused the wall to slide back into place. As it closed, torches along the passage flared to life.  
  
The passage sloped downwards. Crow led the way along it. It smelt a bit musty, but wasn't unpleasant. It took them about five minutes to walk to the Great Hall.  
  
"There's a peep hole," Crow showed Artemis. "So you can look out before you exit. We come out right behind the dais, so that's a good thing." He stuck his eye to the tiny opening and peered out. "Way's clear."  
  
Again, he tapped the wall twice and a section opened. They left the passage and entered the Hall. "They'll be getting ready for supper soon; then it'll be busy."  
  
They wandered back in the direction of their Common Room. "I need to write a letter before dinner," Crow said. "I always have to owl my mum first thing to let her know I made it school all right."  
  
Artemis grinned. That just sounded so un-Slytherin.  
  
"Yeah, I should probably look over all my assignments and figure out what has to be done tonight." He thought abruptly of Daedelus. "What does 'our group' think of Ravenclaws?"  
  
Crow looked surprised at the sudden change of subject, but shrugged. "Best of the other three Houses, though not, of course, as good as ours. We hold Hufflepuff in contempt, despise and loathe Gryffindors, but Ravenclaw isn't necessarily all bad."  
  
Artemis nodded. "Good."  
  
Now Crow looked very curious. "Why?"  
  
"Just wondering."  
  
"Would this have anything to do with those girls you talked to this morning?" Crow gave a knowing sort of leer.  
  
Artemis flushed just a bit. "No!"  
  
"Hmm. Whatever you say. I'm sure it was a theoretical question."  
  
"Burning desire for knowledge about Hogwarts."  
  
"Right."  
  
"And thank you for sharing that knowledge."  
  
Crow laughed. "No problem. Any time."  
  
"I may hold you to that."  
  
_________ __________  
  
The rest of the day proceeded fairly uneventfully. He quite enjoyed his astronomy class, and was amused when Malfoy pointed out the constellation Draco, as if it had been named with him in mind.  
  
That night, after the others had gone to bed, he composed all his thoughts so far into a journal entry in his Fairy Power Notebook.  
  
The next morning, they had charms with the Hufflepuffs. He discovered this was the Professor who was the relative of his tutor. He enjoyed the class quite a bit. He didn't much care for his next class, Herbology, however.  
  
During lunch, he got an owl from Juliet. "Dear Artemis," read her note, "I really wanted to owl somebody! My classes are OK. I'm having a great time, though I haven't discovered anything about you know what. I've been hanging out with the Weasley twins, you remember them, and the Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team--Oliver Wood, and their friends Angelina Johnson and Lee Jordan. (I think Lee and Oliver both have crushes on me!) Hope all is well with you!"  
  
Artemis shook his head and looked over at the Gryffindor table. Juliet was so strange sometimes. He caught her eye and forced a smile; she gave him a thumbs-up. Then he went back to eating.  
  
After lunch, he walked alongside Draco and Zabini out to the Gamekeeper's hut for Care of Magical Creatures. Crow was in the back somewhere, talking to a girl, but Crabbe and Goyle were right behind them. As they came up to the hut, he recognized Potter, Granger, and Weasley coming up from the other side. So this class would be shared with the Gryffindors. He saw Draco and Zabini immediately start to sneer, and hid a sigh. Draco's voice got louder and brighter, as if he were putting on a show of how witty and popular he was. Crabbe and Goyle closed in around him.  
  
He was relieved when the giant man moved at once to start class. Hagrid seemed excited, promising them a real treat. He led them to a fenced off area behind his hut.  
  
"First, open yer books," he instructed.  
  
He was interrupted by a disdainful Draco. "How?" He took a book from his bag and held it up. It was roped shut. Other students pulled out their books, as well. All of the books had been bound in some way to keep them from biting the readers.  
  
Artemis raised an amused eyebrow. But Hagrid looked crestfallen. "Hasn' anyone bin able ter open their books?"  
  
Everyone shook their heads, but Artemis took pity on Hagrid, surprising himself. "*I* could."  
  
They all turned to look at him as he picked up his book and ran his finger down the spine. It opened, quiet and docile. As they continued to stare, he looked over at Granger and shrugged. "I asked the guy who sold me the book," he said. "It seemed the sensible thing to do."  
  
Draco looked annoyed, Hermione chagrined. But Zabini started to laugh. "Of course. How very Ravenclaw of you."  
  
Hagrid shook himself. "Righ' then. Wait here. I'll go get the Magical Creatures."  
  
Draco scowled. "He's still an oaf. The idea, giving us biting books in the first place! Hogwarts is going downhill."  
  
Harry Potter took a step forward. "Shut up, Malfoy."  
  
Draco's eyes narrowed. "Look out, Potter, there's a dementor behind you. Wouldn't want you to *faint* again."  
  
"Woah," Artemis breathed, distracting Draco. He followed Artemis's stare to see Hagrid leading about a dozen ugly, furry, feathery, winged beasts. They had dangerous-looking claws and beaks. Hagrid maneuvered them into the paddock.  
  
"Hippogriffs!" Hagrid announced.  
  
Artemis finally closed his mouth. Somehow, these creatures brought the reality of his situation to him more than flying broomsticks did. Magic was real and it existed. And it was all around him!  
  
"Come closer," Hagrid coaxed. "Just don't insult them." He proceeded to give instructions, which Draco and his two goons didn't even seem to hear. They were muttering about Hagrid and Draco's father. Artemis tuned them out to learn about Hippogriffs. Eventually, Harry got up the nerve to approach one. The class stared, wide-eyed, as he flew on its back around the circle.  
  
Then the rest of the students joined Harry inside the fence and tried to talk to the beasts themselves. Artemis picked one at random and walked up to it. Zabini joined him with a look that seemed to say, 'I'm sure you don't mind if I tag along. Um. . . do you?'  
  
Artemis smiled at him. "Deserting Malfoy, too, are you?"  
  
"He's got Crabbe and Goyle. Do you want to go first?"  
  
"OK." Artemis squared his shoulders and bowed to the black hippogriff. Maintaining eye contact had always come easily. Bowing did not, but he didn't mind too much, since this wasn't a human.  
  
The hippogriff regarded him with what seemed to be a thoughtful expression. Her name was Black Velvet.  
  
For a moment, neither of them moved. Artemis wasn't about to be the one to give in, though. And then the hippogriff bowed back.  
  
Artemis reached out and stroked her feathered neck. It felt exquisitely soft. "Can I ride you?" Artemis whispered to it. "I know that's asking a lot, but you don't want Buckbeak to be the only one marveled at, now do you?"  
  
Velvet tipped her shoulder downward for Artemis to mount. He grinned, and climbed up onto her back.  
  
"Boy, Fowl," Hagrid began to caution him, but Velvet thrust with her wings and the two were aloft.  
  
"Oh, this is better than horseback any day," Artemis murmured, gripping her body firmly with his knees, and holding on more lightly on either side of the neck, careful of the feathers. True, it was bumpy, more like a bucking bronco, but Artemis was delighted.  
  
They flew around the enclosure and the hut, once high, once low. Then Velvet landed, which was a bit alarming, but Artemis didn't let it show.  
  
"Thanks, Velvet," he leaned in and whispered. "You're awesome. You're the best."  
  
He got down as Velvet preened visibly. "Your turn," Artemis reluctantly told Zabini.  
  
Zabini started to make his bow when Malfoy screamed. Artemis jumped and he and Blaise both whirled around to see Hagrid forcibly pulling Buckbeak away from a bleeding Draco, lying on the ground.  
  
"I'm dying!" Draco yelled. "It's killed me!"  
  
The class started talking loudly, shifting around, in a panic. The Slytherins moved together in a distressed but menacing bunch, eyeing Hagrid.  
  
"Yer not dyin'!" Hagrid yelled back, but he was pale and shaken. "I need to get you to Madam Pomfrey. . ."  
  
Granger ran and opened the gate. Hagrid picked Draco up in his arms. Artemis pushed his way forward. Malfoy had a long, deep cut on his arm. Blood seeped out from it. Hagrid carried him off toward the castle at a run.  
  
Pansy burst into tears. "They should fire him!"  
  
A Gryffindor bristled at this. "It was Malfoy's fault!"  
  
Crabbe and Goyle darkened and flexed their muscles.  
  
The students all began walking to the castle, as well.  
  
"Will he be OK?" Bulstrode looked worried as she walked with Pansy. She grabbed at Crowe's arm as he passed.  
  
"I think so. The nurse is pretty skilled, even if the teacher in this case is a moron."  
  
"Malfoy insulted it!" the same Gryffindor snapped. "He had it coming to him!"  
  
"Shut up, Gryff," Crabbe rumbled.  
  
Crow snorted and moved up to walk by Artemis and Zabini. Everyone around them was muttering either for or against Hagrid. The Slytherins, naturally, were all against.  
  
"So much for that lesson," was all Artemis said.  
  
When they finally reached the castle, Pansy ran up at once to the infirmary to see about Draco. The other Slytherins started off towards the dungeons, and the Gryffindors to their tower.  
  
"I'm going to check on him, too," Artemis told his companions.  
  
"It didn't look that bad," Crow responded. "He should be fixed up without any problems."  
  
"I want to see for myself."  
  
Crow shrugged. "If that's what you want. I'm going to the Common Room."  
  
Zabini hesitated. "I'll come with you, Fowl."  
  
"Fine."  
  
So the two of them walked to the infirmary together. "I bet he milks this for all it's worth," Zabini said suddenly.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"He doesn't like Hagrid. Well, none of us do, but Malfoy especially doesn't like him cause Potter's such pals with him. He'll be trying to get him fired, wait and see."  
  
It was impossible to tell from Zabini's tone whether he approved of this or not.  
  
When they entered the medical ward, Madam Pomfrey was just bandaging Draco's arm. A distraught Hagrid and a crying Pansy stood to one side. Zabini and Fowl went and stood by them. "How bad is it?" Blaise asked.  
  
"Madam Pomfrey says he'll be fine," Hagrid began hesitantly, but Pansy cut him off.  
  
"She says! She says! But Draco is in such pain! And *she* has never cared for Slytherins!"  
  
Pomfrey turned and looked at Pansy sharply. "Now see here. . ."  
  
Draco moaned, and the nurse turned her attention back to him. "You *will* be fine. It's just a cut. It'll heal right up. In fact, you can go."  
  
"See!" Pansy proclaimed triumphantly. "Kicks us out as soon as she can! She just doesn't want a scandal! She knows," with an evil scowl at Hagrid, "this is all *his* fault!"  
  
Hagrid continued to look miserable.  
  
Draco climbed off the bed and walked wobbily towards them. "Wait'll my father hears about this," he sneered. "A teacher who gives us a biting book, and then brings dangerous animals for class, and endangers students' lives! He'll have him thrown out of here by morning!"  
  
Pansy rushed to his side. He put his uninjured arm around her shoulder and she supported him along as he walked to the door. Zabini and Artemis exchanged looks and followed.  
  
"Nice of you to be so concerned with my welfare," Draco commented as they headed for their common room. "Didn't expect to see you, Fowl."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
Draco thought about this. "You're new here. That's all."  
  
Draco lounged around the common room the rest of the day. Pansy even took him down his lunch. "Told you," Zabini muttered to Artemis. 


	6. 6

Blood to Gold  
  
By Elbereth in April  
  
Chapter 6  
  
Artemis had Herbology after lunch, which he detested. Plants definitely had no business doing some of the things these plants did.  
  
After that, he washed the dirt off his hands and went to DADA. This, he figured, should be interesting.  
  
They walked into the classroom. Lupin stood at the front, smiling pleasantly at them. No one smiled back. A few whispered insulting things about his clothes and apparent poverty.  
  
"Today's lesson will be a practical one," Lupin spoke confidently, ignoring the whispers. "Follow me."  
  
They looked at each other, puzzled, as Lupin led them to the staff room. Professor McGonagall sat at a table there, drinking tea and doing a wizarding crossword puzzle.  
  
"Sorry to bother you, Professor," Lupin said as the class entered.  
  
"That's quite all right. I had forgotten you had acquired a boggart for each of your Defense classes."  
  
"Not acquired. They conveniently invaded yesterday. Happily for us."  
  
"Boggarts?" Bulstrode demanded loudly.  
  
"Yes." Lupin nodded. "There's one in the wardrobe."  
  
As if it knew they were discussing it, the wardrobe chose that moment to lurch back and forth.  
  
"Who knows what a boggart is?" Lupin asked the class.  
  
"I do," Parkinson answered in a bored voice. "They change their shape to whatever you're afraid of. They hide in dark spaces."  
  
"Very good," said Lupin. "What is our advantage over this boggart? Crow?"  
  
"It'll be confused with so many of us. It won't know what shape it should take."  
  
Lupin smiled. "Correct! Now then, repelling boggarts only needs a simple charm, but you must have strong will! It is laughter that does them in. You must force the boggart to assume an amusing shape."  
  
"Excuse me sir," Artemis couldn't stop himself from saying. "Slytherins don't laugh."  
  
Lupin blinked. Then Zabini spoke up.  
  
"Let me see if I understand. You're going to let this boggart out for us to practice on."  
  
Lupin nodded.  
  
"You expect us to stand here and reveal our deepest fears to the entire class, you, and the Head of Gryffindor House?"  
  
There was a mass step backward by the class.  
  
"I was just leaving," McGonagall said hurriedly, with a look at Lupin that Artemis couldn't interpret. And leave she did.  
  
"First of all, I believe you are highly qualified at mocking laughter," Lupin addressed them. "That's what you're doing here. The boggart will insult you by trying to scare you. You will taunt it by changing its shape and then laughing at it. You use this charm. Repeat after me: Riddikulus!"  
  
"Riddikulus," they responded automatically.  
  
"And second, how about a vow that nothing revealed here will leave this room?"  
  
They stared at him.  
  
"Of course, you could all fail."  
  
Scowls and mutterings as they began to realize they were trapped.  
  
"Come on, the Gryffindors did it!" Lupin encouraged.  
  
"Yeah, well, they're idiots," Zabini snorted.  
  
"Fine," Crow announced suddenly. "I'll go first."  
  
"Ah, a volunteer!" Lupin rubbed his hands together. "Name,please?"  
  
"Thaddeus Laine Crow."  
  
"Mr. Crow, do you know what your greatest fear is?"  
  
"Yeah. Carnies."  
  
". . . really?"  
  
A resentful half-smirk. "I think I should know."  
  
"Okaaay. Very well. When the boggart comes out, the first person it will see is you. And it will assume the shape of. . . a carnie. Now, how can you make a carnie seem less scary?"  
  
Crow thought. "Imagine him buried under a pile of his stupid stuffed animal prizes?"  
  
"Excellent!" Lupin laughed. "So, once Crow breaks free, the boggart will turn to the rest of us. Each of you picture your fear, and think how it can be turned around. . . OK? Here we go."  
  
The group took another step back en masse. Crow wavered, but stayed standing by Lupin, who opened the wardrobe door.  
  
Out sprang a short, fat man with small hands and a loud voice. Crow pointed his wand. His hand was steady. "Riddikulus," he said softly but firmly. There was a cracking noise.  
  
The carnie suddenly looked up in fear as bright pink and purple stuffed kneazles rained down upon it. Crow jeered at it and the class laughed as the stuffed toys piled up.  
  
The animal pile burst apart and the boggart rematerialized in front of Zabini. Blaise faced it, wand out, eyes narrowed, as it sifted into a pale, dark shape all in black, whose mouth opened to reveal pointed fangs.  
  
"Riddikulus!"  
  
With a crack, the vampire's teeth fell out, and then it was clutching at a stake through its heart, a puzzled, comical look on its toothless face. Zabini laughed mockingly. "Take that!"  
  
It fled to Bulstrode and became a huge vulture swooping down to peck her eyes out. "R-riddikulus!" she cried and its beak fell off to be replaced by Wax Kissing Lips ("they pucker up for you--only 3 sickles"). Several other people laughed as she taunted it.  
  
It moved quickly after that. For some reason, Pansy feared a blood-sucking white rabbit. Crabbe was afraid of his great-grandmother, and Goyle of cupcakes ("Yeah, ever since last year," Crabbe whispered. "I don't know why.").  
  
Finally it was in front of Artemis, who had been picturing trolls, goblins, fairies, losing all his money, and discovering that a strange accident had reduced his IQ to that of a gym teacher. But what appeared in front of him was his father, lying cold and dead.  
  
He drew in a breath, eyes going wide as he stumbled back and swore in Gnommish. His breath was coming short and quick.  
  
And then he felt himself becoming suddenly very, very angry. His eyes narrowed to slits.  
  
"Riddikulus," he ground out, picturing Butler getting his hands on that boggart and ripping it to tiny shreds. He smirked and whispered, "Laugh at that, shape-shifter."  
  
Against all rules, it shuddered, because even immaterial, malicious spirits have the sense to be afraid of Butler.  
  
Crack! The boggart exploded, burst into a thousand tiny wisps of smoke, and was gone.  
  
"Fowl. . . what was that?" Zabini asked softly.  
  
"It was a dead person," Parkinson butted in, staring at him. "Are you afraid of dead people?"  
  
Artemis looked at her and she shut up and hid behind Zabini.  
  
"This is exactly why Slytherins don't do this kind of thing," Crow complained. "Well, if anyone needs comforting, they'd better get it from Lupin, because the rest of are gits."  
  
"A moment, Mr. Fowl," Lupin called as they were gathering up their books to leave.  
  
Artemis groaned inwardly and went over to stand in front of the professor. "Artemis, isn't it?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Lupin waited until the room cleared. "Are you. . ."  
  
"It was my father, OK? He was kidnapped and missing for two years before he was rescued just recently. OK? And I still dream sometimes that he's dead and never really rescued at all. Can I go now?"  
  
"Artemis. . ." he paused. "How was he rescued?"  
  
Most of that story he wasn't supposed to tell, but somehow he heard himself say, "I shot him. Very Slytherin of me, yes?" And he grabbed his bag and fled, because when one isn't used to having emotions, there were things that it was hard to deal with.  
  
Artemis tried to put the whole incident out of his mind as he hurried away. He turned a corner in a rush and ran headlong into Havanna Scarlet.  
  
"Sorry about that. . ." he muttered, rather embarrassed.  
  
She brushed the hair out of her eyes and rubbed her side, which had collided with his bookbag. "Werewolves after you?" she asked, somehow managing seduction and sarcasm at the same time.  
  
"No, just. . . Gryffindoric teachers."  
  
She smiled, relenting. Then she put a hand on his arm and said quite seriously, "I'm afraid Slytherins aren't very well understood. Certainly not by the professors here, who all seem to be. . . Gryffindoric, as you so aptly put it." She paused, looking him in the eye. "Don't trust them. Stick with your fellow Slytherins alone."  
  
He managed a smile back, a real one. "Thanks, Scarlett."  
  
"Call me Havanna." Her eyelids drooped down and her lips curved upwards, making her face strikingly tempting, even for a 13-year-old. But Artemis was made of stronger stuff.  
  
"Thanks, Havanna." He patted the hand on his arm and stepped back. "I have to go--I'll be late for Charms."  
  
"We can't have that. Bye, Artemis." She gave a little wave.  
  
He nodded in acknowledgement and went to class.  
  
Artemis was heading back to his common room after class when Catalina came rushing up to him. "Found you! You play chess well, right?"  
  
He barely contained a smirk. "I play well, yes."  
  
"Come on then. There's an imbecilic Gryffindor in the Great Hall, challenging a Ravenclaw girl to a game for 27 Sickles. You can play him when he's won!"  
  
"That's small change. And how can a Gryffindor beat a Ravenclaw?"  
  
"The point is embarrassing a Gryff--House rivalry and all, you know. And it's this particular boy's one talent, which will make it that much better. And Potter's watching!"  
  
"Who am I playing?" Artemis gave in.  
  
"Ron Weasley!"  
  
Well now, interesting indeed.  
  
Artemis was only slightly taken aback by Wizard's Chess, although he was glad he'd gotten to see it once before he had to play it. "It seems you just won 27 Sickles," he said when Ron had proclaimed Checkmate.  
  
"Yeah. Fowl, right?"  
  
"Yes. Well now, you must have already had 27 Sickles in order to make your bet. So that gives you 54."  
  
"I can count." Ron eyed him warily.  
  
"For 54 Sickles, I'll challenge you to a game."  
  
Weasley wavered. He was confident, but this boy looked even more so.  
  
"You're not going to back down from a Slytherin, are you?" Catalina taunted.  
  
Her boyfriend Warrington laughed. "Scared?"  
  
A small crowd gathered, consisting of the defeated Ravenclaw--Luna Lovegood, seemingly brilliant but extremely vague--Weasley, Potter, Granger, Catalina, Chadwick Warrington, and a misplaced Hufflepuff, Hannah Abbott. Ron couldn't bring himself to back down in front of them all.  
  
So here they were now, embroiled in a chess match, when Artemis smiled and took Ron's bishop. Ron froze, envisioning moves ahead. "Uh oh."  
  
Artemis said nothing as Ron glanced over at Harry and Hermione. The girl's eyes widened. "Uh oh?"  
  
"Arty!" a voice exclaimed suddenly. Artemis sighed deeply and turned to Juliet with some tall (good-looking) boy.  
  
"Hello to you, too."  
  
"Arty." Catalina smiled. "How cute."  
  
Artemis glared at her as Juliet came over and hung her arm over the back of his chair. "Have you beaten him yet?"  
  
"What's going on?" the boy with her asked.  
  
The Gryffindors greeted him. "Oh, hello, Wood."  
  
"Just a friendly chess game between two rival Houses," Hannah said.  
  
Wood sat down next to her. "Are you winning, Ron?"  
  
Ron gave him a sickly little smile and moved his knight.  
  
Artemis smirked and moved his own knight.  
  
Luna stared hard at the board. "Uh oh." She stood up and patted Ron's arm. "It was a good try," she said cheerfully, and walked away.  
  
"Weasley's losing?" Wood looked extremely surprised.  
  
"Artemis beat Evan Kashoggi in chess once," Juliet informed them smugly.  
  
Ron groaned and moved his remaining castle.  
  
"Who?" Abbott asked.  
  
"Muggle European chess champion," Granger explained, looking slightly awed.  
  
Artemis took Ron's knight.  
  
Ron moved his castle again.  
  
"Checkmate," Artemis said, feeling pleased.  
  
Ron looked extremely depressed. "Fine," he said in a dull voice. "Here's your 54 Sickles."  
  
"How many Galleons is that?" Juliet asked. Artemis told her.  
  
"Oh." Juliet shrugged. "That's nothing." Ron looked pained.  
  
"Too bad, Weasley," Warrington smirked. "So much for your one talent."  
  
"A Gryffindor beaten by a Slytherin." Catalina clapped her hands together gleefully.  
  
"Leave him alone," Potter scowled, defending Ron, who was turning red.  
  
"I wonder if I could study you and bottle up whatever it is that turns out to have protected you from Voldemort."  
  
Everyone turned to gape at Artemis. "What?"  
  
"I just wonder no one's ever had you in for examining, that's all. Your blood, your DNA, your magic. . ."  
  
"There's no need for that!" Harry cried, alarmed.  
  
Hermione looked at Potter thoughtfully. "That's actually an interesting question, Harry. I wonder. . ."  
  
"Ack! No!" He sprinted away. Granger followed.  
  
"Hey, wait!" Ron yelled after them, but they didn't stop. He sighed and started putting away the chess board.  
  
"Seriously, though, not a bad game," Artemis mused. "You ever want to play sometime--not for money--let me know."  
  
Weasley looked at him, surprised. "Um, OK. You know, it's hard to figure you out."  
  
"Maybe that's because I'm not just black or white."  
  
"You know, Artemis," Juliet interrupted, "your friends Crabbe and Goyle asked me to meet in the Potions classroom, to show me all their wrestling posters."  
  
Artemis coughed. "Did they? What did you say?"  
  
"Are you crazy? I love looking at wrestling pictures!"  
  
Wood abruptly stood up. "You're going to see two Slytherins alone?"  
  
"Don't worry, she can handle herself." Artemis coughed again, hiding a smile that wanted to become a laugh. 


End file.
